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Heaven On My Head

My hair has been a topic of conversation for as long as I remember. Wherever I go, someone always has something to say about my hair whether it’s good or bad. Honestly, my hair has always been a sensitive topic for me because of how much judgement I’ve dealt with over the years. I’ve heard literally it all. “You don’t love yourself because you don’t always wear your hair in its natural state” but when I do its crickets. “You don’t know who you are because you’re always changing your hair.” I must’ve missed the memo that said experimenting with different hairstyles and colors meant that I don’t know who I am. I personally love variety and having the confidence to try so many different styles and colors. My hair being so versatile is awesome. “Your hair looks better straight. You should wear it like that every day.” To that, I say f*** you. I’ve literally had a grown man (someone’s father) grab my hair and make fun of me in the middle of a party because he didn’t like how my hair looked. Another reminder that age does not always equal maturity. There are some 50-year-olds that are out here acting like teenagers and it’s sad.

When someone comments on my hair I typically get irritated because why is it so important to you? Mind your business and if you don’t have any business to mind, then find some. Many people, men especially, base their opinions of my hair on their attraction to me. To them, I’d be more attractive if I did x, y, and z, and that’s irrelevant to me. I don’t care about what you think I should be doing with my body or my hair. What matters to me is that I’m happy. I’m not out here looking for acceptance from strangers or even from people that I know, if I did, I’d be miserable. I personally prefer being happy and comfortable in my own skin. I also came to realize that many of the people that had something to say about me weren’t comfortable with themselves and that’s why they were so comfortable with tearing others down. Bringing people down to their level made them feel superior. That’s something that I’m happy that I can’t relate to because that’s horrible. I hope those people heal and get it together.

I’ve grown to love my hair, its texture, and its special curl/coil patterns that have a mind of their own. My hair is a great representation of who I am; beautiful, wild, versatile, and resilient. My hair is literally heaven on my head, and I never want to view it as anything aside from that. Below I’ve included hair related affirmations for those that are finding it difficult to love their hair. I love you and I love your beautiful hair, no matter what stage it’s in. I pray that you’re one day able to love your hair as much as it loves you<3


  • My hair always radiates beauty, even when I can’t see it.

  • I love my hair and my hair loves me.

  • My hair doesn’t have to look like everyone else’s to be beautiful because it is already beautiful.

  • I accept my hair and all of its wildness.

Bonus hair stories:

  • A Caucasian man telling me that my hair looked and felt like cotton after touching it without permission. This was in public, and it was not a good experience.

  • A man saying to me “I know you want my hair. Black women always say they want my hair.” Sir, I like my own hair and will never want yours.

  • “Is this a wig?!” Then he proceeded to pull my wig. I always wear wigs when I want bangs or any hairstyle that would require me to straighten or overly-manipulate my hair, since I don’t use heat on my hair, but not like it matters anyway. If I want to wear a wig, then that’s what I’m going to do.

If you love affirmations, then I recommend checking out the Petite Book of Affirmations in my shop linked below:

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